Today I am choosing to write about gratitude. This is not only because Thanksgiving is right around the corner, but also because it is during the cold, dark, and wet when it becomes the most difficult to feel happy. Many -- including myself -- sometimes struggle from seasonal depression. I wake in the morning to nothing but the light from my alarm clock, and I walk home from studying by the light of streetlamps and headlights. I think, "do I ever see the sun anymore?" And like a child learning the game of peek-a-boo I wonder, "does the sun exist once it disappears behind the clouds?" Regardless of the fact that I know the answer is resoundingly YES...it doesn't feel like that. It feels like the sun will never shine again.
My father is a brilliant man. Distinct to my memory is the night he made us learn the song, "I am Happy Today for the Sunshine". Now I'll see if I can prove how distinct that memory is by typing out the words to the song:
I am happy today for the sunshine,
For the skies of grey or blue,
For within my heart there's a song of love,
I'll live, I'll work, I'll do
No cloud can cast a shadow,
Over courage such as mine.
So I'll sing my song as I go along,
I'll live, I'll work, I'll do
Each of my siblings and I took turns singing the chorus as a solo, "No cloud can cast a shadow, over courage such as mine!" And we would shout it out as loud as we could. It was the best part of the song, every time. Now as an adult, I sometimes have these words come to my mind as I walk home at night in the freezing wind and snow.
So... this blog post is turning into a rant about singing. I'll make my point as quickly as I can by sharing something that I've realized over the past few years. Before I share this, note that it is my opinion -- it helps me to be grateful for the seasons.
Seasons are symbols. Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter. Each of them symbolize to me a part of something extremely important:
The Atonement
Think about it for just a moment.
Spring is the birth and renewal. It is the time for plants to begin to blossom, the air to sweeten, and for the sun to shine longer. The Spring is a time for planting and for growing. We seem to waken, as if from a deep sleep. We "no longer droop in sin" (2 Nephi 4:28), we "awake! and rise from the dust" (2 Nephi 1:14). It is a time of enlarging, and enlightening. If we can compare the word of God like unto a seed, we can also say that the word of God grows best in fertile ground and weather. Spring is a time for planting and growing. To me, Spring is a symbol of a fertile heart -- one which is humbly ready for the word of God to be planted. It is also a symbol of the resurrection of the Savior, Jesus Christ.
Summer is a brilliant time of light and heat. We experience the sun in its fullness! I like to take a book outside and read in the sun -- soak in as much as I possibly can. "I say unto you, Yea, because it is light; and whatsoever is light, is good, because it is discernible" (Alma 32: 35).
The Fall comes, and this is my particularly favorite season. This is when the leaves change colors. Reds, yellows, oranges, and browns replace the bright spring and summer hues. It reminds me of fire. "But thou shalt declare repentance and faith on the Savior, and remission of sins by baptism, and by fire, yea, even the Holy Ghost." (D&C 19:31, see also Matt 3:11).
And finally Winter -- the gloomy and cold season. Winter is often symbolic of sorry, suffering, deep sleep or death. The sun does not shine, and the night is long. We become so preoccupied with keeping ourselves warm against the chill that hangs or sweeps its way through the air. It is often accompanied by sickness (flu season!). And it is during this time when I sometimes wonder (while struggling to catch my breath against the icy wind), if God made winter to remind us of the Savior's suffering and death. What was truly the most cold, dark, and lonely experience ever had by any being who lived upon the earth? It was that had by our Savior when he took upon himself the sins, sicknesses, and pains of the world. For this reason, I am grateful for Winter.
One last symbol before I close my post. Because of the Atonement; because of the cold, dark, and lonely night experienced by the Lord -- we can be made clean if we turn to him. He has said, "though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool" (Isaiah 1:18). The most beautiful scene is that of a snow-blanketed earth, with soft sunlight breaking through the clouds. It reminds me that I too can be made clean, "as white as snow".
I hope that this Winter you can find joy in remembering the sacrifice made by our Savior, and the opportunity we have to overcome and repent of our sins.
Love,
Samantha
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